Hey! Im back & been doin' my scrapbook therapy !

So... it has been so long since I have shared anything about me with you.I guess you can say I have just had so many episodes of different things happen that I dont know where to begin.I can only tell you that i have survived them and decided to scrapbook for therapy;and you know what? Its working! Im happy since all these things from making sure my kids get to college, to graduating from high school , to making sure my grandbaby is ok (cuz my daughter did have her at 17), just to come back around and say to myself , "were their any happy moments through it all?" and I can say ,"Yes!their were!", so here is my first finished layout of my scrapbook page I hope you like it and their will be more to come cuz let me tell ya , its been one hell of a journey!

I go with the motions , and all I am is NUMB...

I find everyday that Im lifeless... Im tryin' to find meaning in it all again , but no one really gets or understands where Im at in it all . People are all about themselves and most will say that they care , when they have the time too care , but nobody has the time so they don't bother and you find yourself respecting the fact that they don't have time for you . I woke up this morning wondering "Wow! " Im here again" Im so lost. I wake up with the feeling of " Why ? " So I can be told Im doin' this wrong or that wrong , how Im not the perfect parent and never claimed to be ? I know the only reason I exist is for my soulmate that I love dearly and my cat and dog . Thats the real reason , Im temporary in everything else . Your only a parent for a little while and then when the children grow up u end up alone and your lucky if they come over to visit at all and hopefully they come for holidays . Im so stagnant , I have been focusing on this whole time on preparing the house for my grandbaby , and my daughter decides shes gonna go live with her boyfriend for a while , so now I do the preparing for myself now , which is good , my husband and I deserve to have a nice place also . I guess Im just not use to do things for me anymore . Maybe now Im doin' stuff for me and being allowed to do so. All in all my life is good , I guess Im not use to having my child away from me , but they all grow up and I would have loved that it could have been goin' away to college , and leaving me that way would have been awesome cuz we would still be close , but I don't think the way it is now , that her and I will ever be that close again and I guess thats the part of me that is wilting away and dying and I feel soo sad about it but theres nothing I can do about it . I just hope that when that part of me does fade away that I won't look back cuz it would really make me feel like I lost time and time is just too dam precious .

Wow! It gets more action packed by the day! : )

So I am sitting in my back guesthouse, which is my studio , and Im just so excited! Right now we are having our kitchen and our bathroom in our Hollywood house remodeled , so im kind of stuck out in the back cuz the fumes are so bad . I have been enjoying , in the last few months this whole journaling , blogging thing , to where I have even got into photography a little more extensively and am estatic about enbarking into a not so new craft but rather getting pro with it . I have also gotten into scrapbooking and am waiting on my kit in the mail as I speak , also excited about that . I have been feeling very unusually different about things and I thinking this would be healthy for me to journal all the stuff that I love and what makes me blue and what makes me feel alive just so I can remember who I am because lately I have forgotten who I am STRONGLY! So things are looking up , Im excited for alot of things , the remodeling of my houses and my grandbaby being born in just a couple of weeks.

Here we go with the same ol' same ol'...

So Im off to have lunch with the mom of my daughters boyfriend . See I haven't told the story of my daughter , so I will tell the cliffnote version she is a teen pregnancy and so its been a serious journey of ups and downs with her , with the boyfriend , with the boyfriends parents . so we are getting a babyshower organized and its been fun but , you know the boy is still a boy and wants to do boy things like basically go out with friends and thats fine but daughter just gets all grown up about it and he ends up being by her side . You say , " well good for him ! " well he reaLLY doesn't want to be their and then starts acting like a 5 year old , and why do we have to go through that crap just let him go be a boy and she can do what she will do , take care of her and her child and she's a really talented filmmaker , she has a good strong chance to go to one of the best films schools in california but i can tell this guy could potentially get in the way , not the baby cuz im taking care of her but the boyfriend , because he is a boy! so I'll take some pictures and blog them up here and let you know how it goes , wish me luck for those of u who read this crazy stuff : P

What today is like... well... this is everyday LOL!

So this is my everyday thing when I get a chance to stay home and get house stuff done . I get up , have my coffee ,fold my laundry and watch a bit of today show with Matt Lauber and them , then while im doin' all of the above Im embroidering little christmas ornament things for decorations for the holiday , being that Im gonna be a grandma, I want new decorations this year. Im like a octopus or a spider .Until the next blog , talk to ya next time ... thanks for listening...

Wow ! Im startin' to like this blog thang!

So here I am finding that Im really bloggin' everyday lately , it's like I look forward to telling and showing you whats goin' on in my life . Today is friday and I am still very excited for my new remodeling project I was telling you about a couple of bloggs ago . That is comin' together nicely . I will show some pictures of the demolition when that happens , its kinda scary . My father n law hasn't been doin' to well . Its sad because he's such a great guy and he ended up so overwhelmed with life that he's in the Phsyc ward in a hospital . He really doesn't need to be there , but nobody understands him and he gets so upset when people can't understand his point he starts screaming , but the people involved dont get that they shouldn't argue with him they should just agree and he stops but for some of us in this family like my nephew and his grandma , they just go at it with him which leads to him ... well being where he his . I hope he will be out this weekend . I have realized that you shouldn't waste your time arguing , I mean what good does it really do ya? It just makes everybody all angry and you just waste time doin' it when you could have been catchin' a great movie or doin' a project . So I have made a new goal not to agrue with anyone like my daughter who thinks she knows everything , she's 17 and pregnant ! oh yeah LOL! she knows alot alright! ha ha ha , I dont' mean to laugh but i need to see the light in my worries . I certainly cant' stand arguing with my nephew Mike because he's like his grandma and dad he loves to argue for the sake of arguing . I dont' really argue with my soulmate anymore these days and I hope it stays that way .Things are gettin' better around here , and I see life as a lesson to be learned everyday . I always have to remind myself that Im lucky ! and that I have a great life and so much more life to experience and sometimes its gonna be stormy and other times its gonna be super sunny , but that its just all transitory , it really is , its so temporary that you have to continue to make good times so that everyday will be a sunny day . I ride the stormy ones but I always remind myself there TEMPORARY!

Thanks for listening!

Mi cAsA En hOLly Dr. iN HOlLyWOoD : D

So... last weekend was fun , Dave and Mikey went to Agua ( thats what we call Agua dulce house for short LOL! ) so they went off and Im sure for them it was a vacation from the girls , little do they know it was vacation from the boys : P
So.. we cleaned up the house and got ready for our first photo shoot with Jake and Julie ( my friends , michelle's, little ones ) so , the next day we got up and did the photo shoot .

This is Krystal taking her first shots of the cRAzY kIds! :o

This is a shot of Julie in her costume she's a real cutie !


This one is really cute of Jake and Julie walkin' down da street.






This one is really cute , their all cute pictures , there isn't one bad one honestly!



We then headed down to the Blvd. where we hit " Da tUnNel ! "



The neighborhood , alot of people out here are Obamaist.. Im still undecided though...



This is a house pass the tunnel a neighbor strong about Buddhism and not afraid to put it in their front yard , Hollywood is
amazing! : P



So we head on out to the Blvd...



We then end up in the pit of Hollywood where all the tourist are and we get seperated by the busy signal light .... Boy I need to loose some weight seriously! , but that will be a different blog : \



We ended up at a famouse costume store called of course , " Hollywood Costume Company " and Krystal found a scary baby with two heads and did this picture , being that she is preggers herself , joking of course her baby is very healthy .



We then decided lets go to the kodak pit where the tourist really live and have some fun there and we met up with john wayne we didn't think he was real and Krystal says , " why does he have a pouch of money ? ", we didnt' catch on to that and we weren't sayin' really good things either , " we were sayin' stuff like , " he's not real , he wouldn't look that leathery " and Michelle goes , " eeeewww! " and he touches one of the kids and we all scream LOL! good times I tell ya , and we apologized to the john wayne . : )




Krystal started to get a little tired so we decided to head back home and take the metro , which ironically I had never taken before in Hollywood , I mean , i have taken' it in other places like in Europe and Peru but never around here so I was a little excited!



This is my friend Michelle , we have known eachother forever , we are good friends because we can turn our problems into laughing matters and not see them as such a big deal . We also can tell eachother anything and when we get mad we put it all on the table and then we're still friends . Im thankful everyday for the things and people o hala gives me , and Im very thankful to have Michelle and Jake and Julie in my lifes , we had alot of fun on this day out in Hollywood and I can't wait to hang out with them again. : )



So we're headin' back home , what a day...



Back in the tunnel again...



Well that was fun until the next time...